Flea-quent Flier.

Flea-quent Flier.

Flea-quent-Flier

A flea had oiled up his little flea legs and his little flea arms, had spread out his blanket, and was proceeding to soak up the Miami sun when who should stumble by on the beach but an old flea friend of his.

“Oscar, what happened to you?”, asked the flea, because Oscar looked terrible, wrapped up in a blanket, his nose running, his eyes red, and his teeth chattering.

“I got a ride down here in some guy’s mustache and he came down here by motorcycle. I nearly froze to death,” wheezed Oscar.

“Let me give you a tip, old pal,” said the first flea, spreading some more suntan oil on his shoulders. “You go to the stewardess lounge at the airport, see, and you get up on the toilet seat, and when an Air Florida stewardess comes in, you hop on for a nice warm ride. Got it?”

So you can imagine the flea’s surprise when, a month or so later, while stretched out all warm and comfortable on the beach, who should he see but Oscar – looking more chilled and miserable than before.

“Listen,” said Oscar, “I did everything you said. I made it to the stewardess lounge and waited till a really cute one came in, and made a perfect landing and got so warm and cozy that I dozed right off.”

“And so?” asked the first flea.

“And so the next thing I know, I’m on this guy’s mustache again!”

 

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32 Reasons Why Cookie Dough is Better than Men

32 Reasons Why Cookie Dough is Better than Men

32- Reasons- Why- Cookie -Dough- is- Better- than -Men

  1. It’s enjoyable hard or soft.

  2. It makes a mess too, but it tastes better.

  3. It doesn’t mind if you take your anger out on it.

  4. You always want to swallow.

  5. It won’t complain if you share it with friends.

  6. It’s “quick and convenient”.

  7. You can enjoy it more than once.

  8. It comes already protectively wrapped.

  9. You can make it as large as you want.

  10. If you don’t finish it you can save it for later.

  11. It’s easier to get the kind you want.

  12. You can comparison shop.

  13. It’s easier to find in a grocery store.

  14. You can put it away when you’ve had enough.

  15. You know yours has never been eaten before.

  16. It won’t complain if you chew on it.

  17. It comes chocolate flavored.

  18. You always know when to get rid of it.

  19. You can return it–satisfaction is guaranteed.

  20. It’s always ready to go.

  21. You won’t get arrested if you eat it in public.

  22. You don’t have to change the sheets if you eat it in bed.

  23. It won’t wake you up because it’s hard.

  24. You don’t have to find an excuse not to eat it.

  25. You can tell your friends how much you’ve eaten without sounding like you’re bragging.

  26. It won’t take up room in your bed.

  27. It’s easy to pick up.

  28. You never have unwanted cookie dough chasing you around.

  29. You know what the extra weight is from.

  30. It won’t get jealous if you pick up another one.

  31. It never has an insecurity problem with its size.

  32. It is very pliable.

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