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32 Reasons Why Cookie Dough is Better than Men

32 Reasons Why Cookie Dough is Better than Men

32- Reasons- Why- Cookie -Dough- is- Better- than -Men

  1. It’s enjoyable hard or soft.

  2. It makes a mess too, but it tastes better.

  3. It doesn’t mind if you take your anger out on it.

  4. You always want to swallow.

  5. It won’t complain if you share it with friends.

  6. It’s “quick and convenient”.

  7. You can enjoy it more than once.

  8. It comes already protectively wrapped.

  9. You can make it as large as you want.

  10. If you don’t finish it you can save it for later.

  11. It’s easier to get the kind you want.

  12. You can comparison shop.

  13. It’s easier to find in a grocery store.

  14. You can put it away when you’ve had enough.

  15. You know yours has never been eaten before.

  16. It won’t complain if you chew on it.

  17. It comes chocolate flavored.

  18. You always know when to get rid of it.

  19. You can return it–satisfaction is guaranteed.

  20. It’s always ready to go.

  21. You won’t get arrested if you eat it in public.

  22. You don’t have to change the sheets if you eat it in bed.

  23. It won’t wake you up because it’s hard.

  24. You don’t have to find an excuse not to eat it.

  25. You can tell your friends how much you’ve eaten without sounding like you’re bragging.

  26. It won’t take up room in your bed.

  27. It’s easy to pick up.

  28. You never have unwanted cookie dough chasing you around.

  29. You know what the extra weight is from.

  30. It won’t get jealous if you pick up another one.

  31. It never has an insecurity problem with its size.

  32. It is very pliable.

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I won’t always…

I won’t always…

 

I won’t always cry, Mummy
When you leave the room
And my supermarket tantrums
Will end too soon.

I won’t always wake, Daddy
For cuddles through the night
And one day you will miss
Having a chocolate face to wipe.

You won’t always wake to find my foot
Is Kicking you out of bed
Or find me sideways on your pillow
Where you want to lay your head.

You won’t always have to carry me
In asleep from the car
Or piggy back me down the road
When my little legs can’t walk that far.

So cherish every cuddle
Remember them all
One day, Mummy
I won’t be this small.

I- won’t- always

 

 

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